St. Ignatius of Loyola’s most well used prayer, the Examen of Consciousness, was once defined by Fr. Mark Thibodeaux, SJ, who wrote:
An Ignatian way of praying wherein one devotes ten to fifteen minutes of prayer to reviewing one’s day or half day, giving thanks for the good moments and seeking healing and/or forgiveness for the not-so-good ones. The prayer then concludes with looking ahead to the next half day or day, asking God for help to do God’s will in particular ways.
There are many purposes and gifts to this prayer practice, including increased awareness of how God is working in our days and in our lives. In this increased awareness, we become better at discerning which choices best align to God’s will, and thus best align with our living fully and deeply this Christian life.
Although Fr. Thibodeaux focuses on the daily or half-daily Examen in his definition, we can use this prayer practice to review any time period with God. One such period that is just ending in our lives is that grace-filled season of Lent. As Lent has given way to Passiontide, and Passiontide to the all-encompassing joy of Easter, Lent can easily slip into the dim recesses of memory if we don’t make a concerted effort to retain its graces.
In the Church’s wisdom and generosity, she has given us a full and glorious fifty days to enter the celebration of Jesus’ Resurrection. Perhaps during this season-long celebration, some prayer time could be devoted to looking back at the graces God gave during Lent, that is, to making an Easter Examen of Consciousness.
A general rule of the daily Examen is to allow about ten or fifteen minutes, but looking back over an entire liturgical season will likely take longer. Consider setting aside a half-hour or so. Go to your favorite prayer spot. If you don’t have one, any quiet place where you can be comfortable and won’t be disturbed will do. Try your best to set aside the cares of the day, perhaps lighting a candle to signify to yourself that this time is set apart to communicate with God. Relax. This isn’t about getting it “right,” but about opening yourself up to the grace that the Lord longs to give. Ask God for the grace to see your Lent from His perspective.
The particulars of how people practice the Examen vary but follow the same general pattern. Let’s follow that pattern then, shifting our focus to looking at the season of Lent:
We begin with Thanksgiving. Remembering the days, weeks, devotions, retreats, or missions you experienced during Lent, what comes to your mind that you would like to thank God for? Was a particular speaker a gift to you in an area that you have long struggled with? Did consoling Jesus along the Stations of the Cross draw you into His Passion in a new and deeper way? Did someone hand you a prayer card that ended up informing your prayer for the whole season?
This time of offering thanks is not about making sure to list every last grace, but bringing to your awareness the memory of God’s gifts that you wish to thank Him for, and to more deeply ingrain them in your heart. When you feel you have thanked God for all the individual gifts you desire to, allow yourself to feel an overall sense of gratitude for how well God knows and loves you, to bring you His grace in so many different ways. In your own way, express this gratitude and love to the Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit.
Well-grounded in a grateful spirit, we now Ask for Light. As with all prayer, God is the one in charge of this Examen. We ask Him to show us what He would like us to see. In your own words, ask the Holy Spirit to enlighten you regarding your practice and your experience of Lent. This short movement within the Examen is couched in the preceding Thanksgiving and will move you through the remaining parts according to God’s hopes.
Finding God in All Things: In God’s Light, with a grateful spirit, we now look through the days and events of our Lent. If you keep a journal, it may be helpful to skim through it. Looking at a calendar might remind you of things that were going on in your life, in addition to any special practices or events you took part in. As with the Thanksgiving portion, you aren’t looking to list everything, but to think about what was going on inside you during these events, such as joy, pain, confusion, anger, peace, anxiety, boredom, freedom, loneliness, closeness to God, distance from God, or any other notable emotion or movement of spirit.
With this welter of strange and beautiful gifts in your metaphorical lap, ask the Lord, “What are You trying to say to me in all of this?” Let Him speak to you about the attitude underlying your boredom, the love hidden within your pain, the masked intention that caused confusion. One by one, gently move through these gifts in your lap. There may be one that stands out to you as most important, as the “heart” of your Lent, or there may be several. This is your Examen, your time with God. He will show you the gifts He wants you to hold onto through Easter and beyond.
When you feel that you and God have looked over those gifts in your lap, and that you have “found God in all things,” it is time to move on to the Gifts of Sorrow, Forgiveness and Gratitude. At this point of your prayer with God, you will likely feel very safe expressing any regrets over how your Lenten journey may not have lived up to your Ash Wednesday hopes. Perhaps your over-eager fasting led you to being grumpy with your family. Maybe you over-extended your schedule of spiritual “extras” and neglected your first responsibilities. Maybe that one vice, fault, or failing you hoped to leave behind is worse than ever.
None of it is a surprise to the God who loves you. Now is the time to seek His forgiveness in prayer, and if you need to avail yourself of the sacrament of Reconciliation, make the decision to do so. In His incredible generosity, there is even grace in recognizing the moments when we did not respond to the graces God already gave. The Examen helps with that recognition and thus helps us respond to such graces in the future.
For those times where we did respond to graces to resist temptation or grown in virtue, this part of the Examen allows us to show our gratitude to God for the beautiful change inside of us. We receive forgiveness when we fail, and we give thanks when we succeed. In both situations we continually have a God who loves us and will shower us with every grace we need.
Finally, we move into the last part of the Examen: Help and Guidance for Tomorrow. Each part of this prayer builds upon the prior. Here we take everything we have recalled and responded to, everything we have learned and let go of, everything we have given thanks and asked for forgiveness for, and we look to the future.
What Lenten grace don’t you want to lose? What fruit would you like to endure in the rest of your life? Now is the time to ask God’s help with this. It could be as simple as the grace to continue to stay off social media and spend that time in healthier pursuits. It could be as challenging as taking the next step to get help with an addiction you faced through the disciplines of Lent. It could be as wonderful as continuing to fall in love with Jesus by a daily time of prayer and scripture reading. Whatever fruit from Lent that your heart would love to keep consuming “out of season,” ask for it. God is the one who gives us these good yearnings and is ready to fulfill them.
Yes, God gives many graces during Lent. Yes, when we cooperate with those graces He bears much fruit in us. By spending some time looking back at those graces, we give thanks to this wonderful God who loves us. By offering an Easter Examen, we can retain the fruits of the season. By walking in these fruits, we give God the greatest thanksgiving as we share our newness of life with our neighbor.
Lord, thank you for the season of Lent and the fruit it yields. Help us to spend a little time with you letting those graces sink into our hearts, minds, and souls. As we walk in the restored life you died to give us, help us to live it for love of you and neighbor.