When I was little, I watched my mother prepare bread. After mixing the ingredients, she’d sprinkle dusty, sweet flour on the counter and push the heels of her hands deep into the dough. She kneaded until it became a spongy mound and the flour had vanished. She’d place it in a bowl and cover it with a towel.
“The kingdom of heaven is like leaven which a woman took and hid in three measures of meal, till it was all leavened” (Mt. 13:33). This was the purpose of my mother’s kneading, to thoroughly mix the yeast with the other ingredients. When the yeast raised the dough, oh, so high, it was ready for the oven. I tried watching once, but the process was sooo slow, my curiosity evaporated, and I went to play.
Because of the yeast’s imperceptible fermentation, the Parable of the Yeast suggests that divine hiddenness can be common. When your spiritual life seems dry and stale, you may feel God has given up. Don’t turn away. If you keep your faith and persevere, He is likely preparing you for a greatness you didn’t know you had.
Our greatest accomplishment is to be a saint in Heaven. It is while you are experiencing the feeling of being far from God that you can learn how much you truly love and trust Him. If you dedicate your actions to the glory of God, then no effort is wasted.
Mother Teresa, the nun who influenced hundreds of women to care for Calcutta’s poor, experienced an extended absence of God. Letters from Mother Teresa to her spiritual director reveal that she felt abandoned by God for 50 years. Yet, she loved and trusted Our Lord enough to build the Missionaries of Charity into a world-wide organization.
St. Faustina Kowalska found no consolation in prayer for two-and-a-half years. She later wrote:
A darkness began to invade my soul, growing thicker and thicker. My spirit became dark, the truths of the faith seemed absurd to me. When someone spoke to me of God, my heart was like a stone, incapable of the slightest act of love! I found no consolation in prayer . . . Often during the entire Mass, I did nothing but struggle with blasphemies that rushed to my lips.
She persevered, and although she had only a minimal education, Our Lord gave us through her the beautiful Divine Mercy prayer as a means of loving God.
Pope Pius X called St. Thérèse of Lisieux the “greatest saint of modern times.” After becoming a cloistered nun and unable to visit her father, she too suffered dryness in prayer. She thought Jesus wasn’t holding up His end to keep the exchange going, and her grief led her to fall asleep during prayer. Tuberculosis brought on a great period of spiritual darkness. Without faith, she would have taken her own life. Yet this girl who died at 24 wrote what would become known as, The Little Way, a beloved primer about making small sacrifices daily to achieve sainthood.
A baker adds yeast at the beginning of the mixing process to integrate it uniformly. We receive baptism at the beginning of our Christian journey. The Holy Spirit is hidden within us like the yeast is concealed in the dough. Whereas the yeast and the flour naturally work together, we must actively seek the will of God to reap the benefits of the Holy Spirit within us.
If you stare at dough while it’s rising, the changes are imperceptible. If you step away and return, you will see the results. It’s frequently upon reflection we notice the work of the Holy Spirit.
Baptized a Protestant, I married a Catholic girl. That led to family and deployment to war and entering the Church. A health crisis with our third child intersected with a spiritual awakening. I have roller-coasted a couple of times between employment and unemployment. At any specific moment, I wasn’t cognizant of the Holy Spirit.
Still, I’ve been a lector and a catechist. I led a bible study on the four Gospels. I never thought I would have an article published because I don’t have a theology degree. Yet it’s happened more than once. Looking back, I can see the Holy Spirit guiding me, and I expect best is yet to come.
Despite spiritual dryness, St. Teresa of Calcutta, St. Thérèse of Lisieux, and St. Faustina all contributed by building little things into remarkable things. They accomplished it by constantly trusting God and seeking His will.
Overcoming spiritual dryness requires effort. It’s easy to fall into the trap and think God is out of touch and lose focus on what’s important. I experienced a period of dryness around 10 years where it was difficult to become excited about anything related to our Faith. Catholicism has unique recourses to helps us ride out spiritual dryness. I have a few insights; they may seem fatuous or inane, but they worked. The fire returned about eight years ago.
Pray as a family or with a friend and ask God to reveal His will. Pray in total humility. I like an excerpt from the Stations of the Cross: I love you Jesus, my love, and I repent of every having offended you. Grant that I may love you always and do with me as you will. If possible, pray at an adoration chapel. I feel that Jesus is there waiting for me.
Spend time reading scripture along with a commentary. To paraphrase the Catechism (#2653), we speak to God when we pray; He speaks to us when we read scripture.
Visit a holy shrine. The Holy Land and holy sites in Europe have a high travel cost. In our country, the incorrupt body of Sister Wilhelmina, the foundress of the Benedictines of Mary, Queen of the Apostles is on display at the convent in Gower, MO. Another great site is the National Shrine to Our Lady of Campion, in Wisconsin. It is the only approved Marian apparition in North America. In both visits, I felt the presence of God upon arrival.
Frequent the sacraments, especially Reconciliation and the Eucharist. Hearing the words, “I absolve you,” can be uplifting, and Our Lord loves a humble heart. Savor the reception of the Eucharist—Our Lord’s Body and Blood. Listen intently to the words, “I absolve you,” or “This is my body” and “This is my blood.” You may hear the voice of the priest, but it is Jesus Christ who speaks.
St. Thomas Aquinas wrote, “In this life, no one can fulfill his longing, nor can any creature satisfy man’s desire. Only God satisfies, he infinitely exceeds all other pleasures. That is why man can rest in nothing but God.”
Like the bread, you may have to go through an intensely hot trial. I felt it during my periods of unemployment. Once you pass through, just as bread is sustenance for the body, you can then be spiritual sustenance for another because Christ nourished you first.
Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash
